Paradigms:

The other day I happened to watch the last 30 minutes, or so, of (500) Days of Summer. As weird as it may sound, as a result, I learned a number of life lessons.

1. Considering my personal disapproval of one of the most significant traits of Summer (the season) (i.e. the heat), I find it extremely [unfair?] to cast Zooey Deschanel in a title role, where her character's name happens to be Summer. Especially when that character fits into the story, loosely, as "the one that got away." Fate 9,542,089,938; Thane 1 and 3/5.

2. I finally realized that I am actually as old as I act. Or, rather, I am as old as I should be acting--and am fully capable of acting. My entire life, I've always been the freakishly "responsible" kid, who got along as well with adults as I did with my peers (if not a little better). Grownups loved me. Not only because I was an oddly respectable kid who didn't get into trouble, but because I was the kind of kid who had the potential to become somebody.


Telling a kid that he's abnormally mature for his age doesn't really mean that much at the time. If anything, it's a simple recognition that he doesn't live up to the potential for idiocy that his youth qualifies him for. Truth be told, kids (and teenagers) really don't have that many responsibilities. In fact, their only real responsibility is to not screw up their life so bad that they can't fix it when they get older. (Which is extremely important, it just doesn't compete with the sorts of responsibilities that adults have to live up to on a daily basis). The statement that adults mean as a compliment is--in reality--more of an investment in the kid's future than anything else.

You see, most kids who are unusually responsible/mature for their age never have an opportunity to live up to their potential while in their youth. They're kids. And, they know that they are just kids. And, everybody else knows that they are just kids. Being responsible and mature, for a kid, means that they don't get into trouble (or, at least, not as much as they could). And, that's about it.

All of that said, I have not yet managed to live up to my potential. Since I got back from my mission three years ago, I assimilated as well as I could into college life. I assumed that was what I was supposed to do. The lifestyle at BYU allows for the reality that some male students don't begin their college careers until after they return from their missions. As a freshman, I was--naturally--mature when compared to freshmen who had just graduated from high school, but that was about it. As a recently returned missionary, I was still getting accustomed to regular life. I used my fellow BYU students as models of how I should act.

The problem is, most male BYU students--though more mature than their younger counterparts at other universities--are not nearly as well-grounded as their actual peers. Yes, missionaries gain important life experiences on their missions that help them develop their sense of responsibility and their ability to live up to that responsibility; but when they get home, it is extremely difficult for them to not pick up--socially--more or less where they left off two years previously. While still attending college, it is very hard not to act and feel like an average college student, even if most people your age have graduated and are starting their careers.

As it turns out, I am, in fact, twenty-four years old. I am at a point in my life where my age finally allows me to live up to my potential. I may still be in college but that is no excuse not to start living like the adult that I am.

3. Also, while watching the movie, I became fully aware of the type of adult that I want to be. There are certain ideals that the more salient parts of my personality are well suited for. While not necessary for me to be a well-functioning, successful, and content human being, it would be impossible for me to live up to my full potential if I did not cultivate those attributes which are most important to me in the process. In short, while watching the movie, I was given a glimpse of the person that I need to become in order to have a fulfilling early adulthood.

How I managed to get that vision out of the movie, I may never know.

4. Finally, the movie served as a reminder of a few of the things that I have come to value most in life. Insofar as the emotional struggle that the main character (played by that one guy) endures serves as a general outline for the most persistent and obnoxious failures in my life, I am particularly able to appreciate and to sympathize with the lessons that he learned along the course of the movie. Ultimately, I have come to highly value honesty and openness in my relationships with other people. Communication is important. Having the guts to do what is right and necessary to try to cultivate it is extremely important to me.

Having no one of importance with whom to exercise such honesty (though the story-line of the movie serves as the emotional epitome of my life, it is also happens to be a million time more interesting than my life has ever actually been), I am prone to forget how valuable it is to me. It would be a shame if I don't remember it when I finally find an opportunity to do so.